Post It Notes

Last Monday was our nineteenth wedding anniversary.  My husband was working out of town and didn’t call until the day after to wish me Happy Anniversary.  To my chagrin, I had COMPLETELY FORGOTTEN ABOUT IT!  I could imagine him working up his courage to call, shaking in his work boots, thinking that I would be upset.  He must have been relieved that he wasn’t in trouble and couldn’t be because I didn’t remember it at all.  Instead, I thought it was hilarious that neither of us was paying attention.

I recall a time when I would have been devastated that my husband called the day after “our special day”.  I probably would have cried, pouted, and claimed he didn’t care about me.  I would have been disappointed that we wouldn’t have been together to celebrate the day or unhappy that we didn’t have plans for a special dinner out with an exchange of gifts.  It was not so this time.  I simply forgot it all together.  I found myself asking if my marriage had become so blasé it wasn’t important to mark the day we said our vows.  I wondered if my marriage could be in trouble.  Should I be reading a book by Dr. Phil?

We have been through a lot together over the years.  There have been good times and bad.  In spite of the traumas that often drive a couple apart, we remain…..married.

This past Valentine’s Day, there were no flowers or candy, and that is a good thing.  I would not be here talking about them.  They would be gone and forgotten.  Instead, my best friend was with me that day, offering his arm to me to help me keep my balance walking across the parking lot to the doctor’s office.  He sat by my side, quietly reading a book, while we waited in the waiting room.  And he was there when my appointment was done to drive me home and ask me if I was alright.  No gifts or cards, no romantic dinner or night out on the town, just that solid, dependable bond that has been there from day one and is still here.  I don’t need special celebrations once or twice a year to know that I am blessed every day.

No, I don’t think my marriage is blasé.  It is peaceful and full of trust.  Dr. Phil couldn’t possibly have anything to add to what I have already got.  And I’ve decided my marriage isn’t in any kind of trouble…..that some Post It Notes won’t fix.